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this originally started as a standalone batch of songs entitled "ATHENGS" written while away on tour and primarily concerning distance & leaving (and was overall very self-concerned.) once we got home, it morphed into this collection of songs which is in many ways a rejection of the tired impulse to "hit the bong & write a sad song again". this is also the first CIVILS release to utilize 8-track tape instead of 4-track cassette.


released January 6, 2017

recorded october 2016 @ cave sound in athens ga
bass on "sad songs" by ryan taylor
artwork & recording by drew kirby
special thanks to stephen cope

do music mist limiting!



all rights reserved


CIVILS Athens, Georgia

CIVILS is the home recording project of Drew Kirby (Mothers, New Wives). CIVILS deals primarily in experimental pop and genre obfuscation. CIVILS prizes intuition over calculation. CIVILS aims to have as many tapes as lil b.

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Track Name: WIDE OPEN
till and go.
wide open, wide.
i don’t know why.
wide open,
wide home.
navel gazing always seemed so straight
there are several ways to keep your eyes on the stadium
apple prest arms indicative of a host who lengthens
showing me, “i learned taxonomy
the natural order of all things
like a dance they practiced years
before we lived.”
i hope i can forgive myself for this life i live of indecision
i havent come since kentucky
i aint never really been no good at leaving
so i by the time i reach the other end of the eagle
ill know its time to ship out soon
to somewhere north or west, unvested in anywhere but here
so go on, good leaver, evade the shame and evacuate
the places i am from
no one should be surprised
least of all i

who could love a real absentee like me?
i feel like rotten indolent decay like sugar on my teeth
and i was speeding across the beltine to another offering
now im lost and keeping quiet to circumvent my fate
holy host, a reckoning, erase

go on, good leaver, move over anything
good luck & god damn
what meant so much there at the time now passe lines
and we all will wait for you to arrive
doldrums, doldrums
rose gold, you were rose gold
i remember how you felt and i remember what i saw when i opened up the door
i couldnt believe

who could love an animal like me?
im out here lost in disbelief at night
and i find myself believing
it’s been two years since i tasted you
and i went home in defeat
when i finally showed my teeth
i didn’t really mean to,
i didn’t really need to,
i didn’t really mean to believe.
Track Name: SAD SONGS
it isnt okay to write sad songs
it isnt no use to write sad songs
i get brainfreeze, i just play along
it feels so wrong to write sad songs

i only call out when i write sad songs
every time i get wronged gotta be in a song
now these wrongings stick around for far too long
i am not fair when i write sad songs

i am not fair when i write sad songs
im never prepared to write sad songs
but i get brainfreeze and just play along
hit the bong and write a sad song again

aw distant mist now, when everything was porcelain
sex was new saturnalia was inside your room
unpracticed seeping, fiddling with guilt in the concrete seat now
kneebent and giving

up & at em gotta grab a bag of trans fat
one lb for one lb
let the matter take a wild far out & last ride for now
until the next sundown

i stare down mostly stepping too loud
“sorry, cant you hear youre too loud??”
still too loud, i spent the rent on a muzzle to be tuned down
spent the rest on bubble shoes now, balloon shoes now
****?????****?????like that
“you must move like a film score
your hair mats like a monet & i can see you from far away
youre still too loud”

it isnt okay to write sad songs
it does not help to write sad songs
im not speaking for you, im just speaking for me
but it feels so wrong to write sad songs

it isnt okay to write sad songs
it does no good to write sad songs
i just get brain freeze and i play along
say it feels so wrong to write a sad song again!!!!